The following is from our book, The Diamond in Your Household of Faith, as featured in the Believer’s Voice of Victory magazine and available on our website: davidweeter.org
Unfortunately, the vast majority of the body of Christ has no idea what God’s description of a wife really is. They even read Proverbs 31 all the time and still have no clue. There are books and messages galore about the Proverbs 31 woman, but as we dive into the subject of a “virtuous women,” you may be shocked by what it actually means. The majority of these teachings are vastly incomplete at best and blatantly incorrect at worst.
If you ask the average member of any church what the characteristics of a virtuous woman are, most of the time you will hear words such as “chaste, timid, quiet, meek, godly, pious, soft-spoken.” But what does virtuous really mean? In Hebrew, which is the language used to write the book of Proverbs, virtuous means: “a force, whether of men, means or other resources; an army, wealthy, virtue, valor, strength, able, activity, army, a band of soldiers, or a company; great forces, goods, host, might, power, riches, strength, strong, substance, train as in training of a soldier, valiant, valor, virtuous, war, and worthy.”
Did you hear anything indicating soft-spoken, demure, quiet, pious, or chaste? Those words aren’t there. As a matter of fact, this very word translated virtue is the same word that was used to describe David’s mighty men of valor. (See 2 Samuel 23.) The words valor and virtuous used are translations of the exact same Hebrew word. That is how God describes a wife!
No wonder her price is far above rubies. No wonder she’s the diamond.
As we go through the rest of Proverbs 31, we’ll see God describing the details of what this virtuous woman looks like.
“The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life” (vv. 11–12). You can trust someone who is worthy and full of valor and strength. They’re powerful. They have great might. They are a force of resources and means. You can trust in someone like that.
“She seeks wool, and flax, and works willingly with her hands. She is like the merchants’ ships; she brings her food from afar” (vv. 13–14). If she fits this definition then she is rich. She has the means, resources, and ability to do these things.
“She considers a field, and buys it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard” (v. 15). She can do so because she’s rich, successful, and hard-working.
We can’t skip over verse 17, “She girds herself with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.” I like what my spiritual father says, “She ain’t no chicken woman.” She’s strong. She is not scared of anything.
Men like to quote Job 38:3, “Gird up now thy loins like a man,” and 1 Corinthians 15:13 where it talks about acting like a man. But right here in Proverbs 31:17, the virtuous woman girds her loins with strength and strengthens her arms.
“She perceives that her merchandise is good.” She makes good choices and does things with excellence.
“She stretches out her hand to the poor” (v. 20). She has plenty of money to give to the poor, and she is generous in doing so.
“All her household are clothed with scarlet. She makes herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple” (v. 21–22). In the context of the day, these were exquisite, fine raiments.
“Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land” (v. 23). This is the description of the ideal family as God intended. In this age of social media, people often point their finger and say, “Those people just post the good things. You never know what’s going on behind the scenes. They make themselves look like the perfect family.” Well, such a thing does exist and it is described in several places in the Bible. This is our goal! We should always be reaching toward the prize that is set before us in places like Proverbs 31 where it lists what the family is supposed to be like.
“She makes fine linen, and sells it” (v. 24). She knows how to turn a profit.
“She delivers girdles unto the merchant. Strength and honor are her clothing” (vv. 24–25). That strength and honor is inherent to the definition of the word virtuous.
“She opens her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness” (v. 26). There’s a saying that I’ve heard and spoken often, “One word from God can change your life forever.” The virtuous woman can speak a word from God in your life and change things.
“She looks well to the ways of her household, and eats not the bread of idleness. Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her” (v. 28). Men, listen up. Her husband praises her! He doesn’t deride her. He doesn’t embarrass her. He lifts her up and praises her.
“Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all” (v. 29). These are the daughters taught by a virtuous woman. Elder women are supposed to teach the younger according to the book of Titus. (See Titus 2:3–4). “Favor is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates” (vv. 29–30). Not only will the virtuous woman who fears the Lord have favor and beauty, but she shall also be praised.
Remember in the last chapter, one of the attributes of a diamond that determines it’s value is a multifaceted cut. It is no coincidence that Proverbs 31 seems to be describing some sort of Wonder Woman superhero! She is multifaceted and therefore highly valuable. From manufacturing to real estate, from physical fitness and ferocity to shipping and exports, there seems no end to her God-ordained abilities and anointing!